Filed by The Dude on Monday, June 29, 2026 — a satirical filed report from the newsdesk. [Parody]
COLUMBUS, OH — Madison Reeves, 28, was arrested Wednesday after authorities discovered she had submitted a 1,400-word fake obituary for her very much alive ex-boyfriend to 14 local newspapers across c

COLUMBUS, OH — Madison Reeves, 28, was arrested Wednesday after authorities discovered she had submitted a 1,400-word fake obituary for her very much alive ex-boyfriend to 14 local newspapers across central Ohio, complete with funeral details and a Venmo memorial fund. Reeves and her ex, 31-year-old fitness trainer Brandon Whitaker, had broken up 6 months earlier after a 14-month relationship. According to the Franklin County Sheriff's Office, Whitaker learned of his own death from his mother, who saw the obituary in The Columbus Dispatch over her morning coffee. Per the arrest report: - Reeves paid $1,847 in total submission fees across 14 newspapers using 3 different debit cards - The obituary claimed Whitaker died "tragically while saving a golden retriever from a frozen pond" - She listed his cause of death as "complications from being emotionally unavailable" - The piece described him as "survived by his ex-girlfriend Madison, the love of his short life" - She included a Venmo handle labeled @JusticeForMaddie for "memorial donations" - A photo of Whitaker shirtless at a 2022 music festival was used as the official obituary headshot Detective Howard Penbrook said Reeves told arresting officers the obituary was "emotional closure" and that "if he was going to ghost me, I was going to make it official." "She listed me as the primary mourner," Whitaker confirmed. "Above my own mother. The funeral was scheduled at a venue we had our second date at. She RSVP'd 47 people." The fake obituary declined to comment, citing structural fraud. Reeves faces charges of fraud, harassment, and falsifying public records. She is being held on $20,000 bond. She wrote the death, the date, the lie. The only thing buried was her alibi. Images and full story copyrighted TBC Viral Media 2026. #funny #comedy #fblifestyle #satire #FORENTERTAINMENTONLY
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