Filed by The Dude on Sunday, August 9, 2026 — a satirical filed report from the newsdesk. [Parody]
MAN ARRESTED AFTER BUILDING A FORT OUT OF PAPER TOWEL PALLETS AT COSTCO AND REFUSING TO COME OUT
MAN ARRESTED AFTER BUILDING A FORT OUT OF PAPER TOWEL PALLETS AT COSTCO AND REFUSING TO COME OUT DENTON, TX — Marcus Delray, 34, was arrested after rearranging six pallets of paper towels into a small fort with a concealed entrance in the warehouse aisle, then refusing to leave when employees asked him to come out. fort was built using six full pallets, restacked to create walls and a hidden entryway Delray reportedly brought his own blanket and a bag of chips before settling in he remained inside for nearly two hours before an employee noticed the missing pallet arrangement incident report describes staff requesting he exit "multiple times" before deputies were called Delray allegedly told deputies he was simply waiting for his wife to finish shopping Employees say the fort itself was surprisingly well constructed, with the entrance angled away from the main aisle so it went unnoticed by most passing shoppers for over an hour. "We've had kids build small forts out of cereal boxes, that happens," said store manager Renata Ojeda, 8 years with the location. "We've never had a grown man build one out of paper towel pallets and refuse to leave it." Delray was arrested for trespassing after declining to exit the structure when asked. He reportedly requested a few more minutes to "wait it out" before deputies helped him climb down from the pallets. Some people wait in the car. Marcus built an actual fort and settled in with snacks. Images and full story copyrighted TBC Viral Media 2026. #funny #comedy #fblifestyle #satire #FORENTERTAINMENTONLY
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