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WOMAN JAILED AFTER POURING A BOWL OF FRENCH ONION SOUP ON HER DATE FOR ORDERING A "DRY-AGED RIBEYE…WOMAN POSES AS A SHERIFF'S DEPUTY TO GET FREE FOOD, EATS 27 DONUTS BEFORE ANYONE REALIZES SHE'S NOT…JACKSONVILLE, FL — A FLORIDA MAN WAS ARRESTED AFTER ALLEGEDLY RIDING AN ALLIGATOR THROUGH A…CRUISE PASSENGER DETAINED AFTER TURNING LIFEBOAT DECK INTO A FULL-SERVICE TIKI BAR COMPLETE WITH…FLORIDA MAN CHARGED AFTER DRIVING A GOLF CART TO HIS OWN DUI HEARINGWOMAN JAILED AFTER POURING A BOWL OF FRENCH ONION SOUP ON HER DATE FOR ORDERING A "DRY-AGED RIBEYE…WOMAN POSES AS A SHERIFF'S DEPUTY TO GET FREE FOOD, EATS 27 DONUTS BEFORE ANYONE REALIZES SHE'S NOT…JACKSONVILLE, FL — A FLORIDA MAN WAS ARRESTED AFTER ALLEGEDLY RIDING AN ALLIGATOR THROUGH A…CRUISE PASSENGER DETAINED AFTER TURNING LIFEBOAT DECK INTO A FULL-SERVICE TIKI BAR COMPLETE WITH…FLORIDA MAN CHARGED AFTER DRIVING A GOLF CART TO HIS OWN DUI HEARING
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Filed by The Dude on Tuesday, September 8, 2026 — a satirical mugshots report from the newsdesk. [Parody]

★ BREAKINGMUGSHOTSFILED 4H AGO

She was caught in his parents’ bed with his stepdad, then called the cops on herself. Family members say the house erupted, doors slammed, and she stayed on the phone until officers arrived and walked

She was caught in his parents’ bed with his stepdad, then called the cops on herself. Family members say the house erupted, doors slammed, and she stayed on the phone until officers arrived and walked

She was caught in his parents’ bed with his stepdad, then called the cops on herself. Family members say the house erupted, doors slammed, and she stayed on the phone until officers arrived and walked her out.The comments are feral. One side says she is chaotic, destroyed a family on purpose, and the stepdad is just as guilty. The other side is arguing she “exposed the house” and that calling the police was the only honest move left. People are fighting over who the real villain is: the ex, the stepdad, the parents who didn’t see it, or the guy whose whole family just became a public spectacle. The mugshot is already being used as both a punchline and a warning.#funny #comedy #fblifestyle #satire #FORENTERTAINMENTONLY

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▍ THIS HAS BEEN ▍

THEDUDE
HUMOR REPORT

— THE DUDE ABIDES —

Back tomorrow with more reports, man.