Filed by The Dude on Saturday, August 8, 2026 — a satirical filed report from the newsdesk. [Parody]
WOMAN, 73, CHARGED AFTER TAKING CONTROL OF AN AIRPORT TRAM AND REDIRECTING IT TO THE WRONG TERMINAL
WOMAN, 73, CHARGED AFTER TAKING CONTROL OF AN AIRPORT TRAM AND REDIRECTING IT TO THE WRONG TERMINAL DENVER, CO — Marlene Otterby, 73, was charged after reaching through an unlocked service panel on an airport tram and redirecting it three terminals past its scheduled stop with 34 passengers still aboard. Otterby reportedly accessed the operator console through a panel she says "just popped open" near her seat tram continued past its programmed stop for nearly four full minutes before an attendant intervened her boarding pass, found on the console, showed a gate that had allegedly changed twice that morning passengers say she remained calm throughout, occasionally announcing "almost there" over the open intercom transit authority confirmed no doors opened and no safety systems were bypassed during the incident Passengers say the tram's usual smooth ride became noticeably erratic partway through, with several assuming a system malfunction until Otterby was spotted at the console. "We've had people lean on emergency buttons by accident," said airport transit supervisor Renata Cho, 13 years with the authority. "We've never had a passenger take manual control and just keep driving to a terminal of her choosing." Otterby was charged with interfering with transit operations and released after the tram was manually reset by staff. She reportedly told officers her gate changes had "worn down her patience completely" and she "simply took the shortest route she knew." The authority has since ordered an inspection of all service panels on the tram fleet, with several sharing the same unlocking issue. Some travelers miss a connection. Marlene decided to drive there herself. Images and full story copyrighted TBC Viral Media 2026. #funny #comedy #fblifestyle #satire #FORENTERTAINMENTONLY
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